King Edmund's Inaugural Address
by Rose and Psyche
Summary: NBC flash headlines: King Edmund Sweeps the Polls! Rookie reporters, Rose and Psyche, live from the heart of the action.


**A Note from the Authoresses: You may find this strange, you may even find this baffling and if you have not read any of our previous works, or seen the poll on our profile, you will be completely stumped. Just for the record, we voted for Peter. Happy Valentine's Day!**

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><p>Live from the Narnian Broadcasting Company:<p>

In a surprise turn of events King Edmund the Just swept the polls with 64 percent of the vote. High King Peter the magnificent is runner-up with 14 percent and as Narnian tradition dictates, will take the post of Vice King. King Frank came in third with 10 percent of the vote and will be the Chancellor of the Exchequer. King Caspian, King Tiran and Queen Susan tied for fourth place and have been offered positions in King Edmund's Privy Council. The remaining candidates have not released statements yet, but it is rumored that Queen Jadis is threatening to call for a recount. King Miraz left yesterday on a chartered liner from the popular Dawn Treader Cruises. Queen Lucy has not expressed any regrets at the outcome of the elections, but is announcing the publication of her new book, 'Elections for Dummies'. King Gale, King Rillian and Queen Swanwhite have been planning the inaugural ball and are redecorating Cair Paravel. We have not been able to locate Aragorn. Glenstorm the Centaur is slated to swear in the new king and though images of the royal robes to be worn at the inaugural ceremony have not been released yet, we do have a statement from King Edmund:

"To the Creatures of Narnia:

You asked me how a raven is like a writing desk…but that is beside the point.

I understand that_ 'Tis Better To Have Loved and Lost/ Than Never To Have Loved At All_, but you are heading for a fall if you keep on in your wicked ways. Blood has been shed _In Freedom's Cause_ before and will be again. _All Is Fair in Love and War,_ but you may find someday that you are in _The Crises_ and your _Pride and Prejudice_ will prevent _All's Well that Ends Well_. Although, as an aside, if you want to continue in your _Vanity Fair_, take a lesson from _Macbeth_. Believe me, my dear countrycreatures, this is not _Much Ado About Nothing_. After all, _Ours Not To Reason Why, Ours But To Do and Die._

I realize that you will miss your last king as _Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow,_ but I hope and pray that under my leadership Narnia will find the _Wealth of Nations_. You may think I'm crazy…_Crazy Like A Fox._

In _War and Peace_,

Your Loyal King,

Edmund the Just

_A Rose By Any Other Name Would Smell As Sweet_

Let us all rise and sing the Narnian National Anthem!

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><p><em>Narnia; most cherished of all realms.<em>

_Green sweeps to tranquil shore_

_Where the blue waves overwhelm,_

_Sweet with years of lore._

_~o*o~_

_Rise, unite! Clasp hands to guard her_

_And protect her from all harm_

_Her mighty mountains and tawny fields_

_Are held within your arms._

__~o*o~__

_Doubly blessed with Lion's breath_

_A jewel among the nations,_

_So treasure her ancient value, lest_

_She falls beneath time's ocean._

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><p>By the way…um…inky quills…get it? Inky quills? All right, not my fault if you don't get it…<em>be<em> thick if you want to.

_Sent From My Purple Paisley Pattern iPhone"_

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><p><strong>Update 215/14**

Due to the suggestion of CaraLee934, we've decided to post the poll questions for you late-comers who didn't get to vote.

The poll is as follows:

1. King Edmund: How is a raven like a writing desk? or better yet, how is a writing desk like a raven?...vote for me and I'll tell you the answer!18 votes (64%)

2. High King Peter: Vote for me if you want a king who knows one end of a sword from the other! After all, I have it sorted. 4 votes (14%)

3. King Frank I: A candidate from the working class, who knows and understands what you feel! 3 votes (10%)

4. King Caspian X: I do not feel myself sufficient for this office, but Aslan says I am. We've entered a new age of technology and exploration. You think the moon is far away? Vote for me and I'll bring you to Tarva!1 vote (3%)

5. King Tirian: I'm the guy who isn't afraid to show his emotion. Meet me at the White Rock to hold a dialogue on the state of our country! 1 vote (3%)

6. Queen Susan: Free nylons and lipsticks for any girl over sixteen! 1 vote (3%)

7. King Gale: Any dragons in your life? vote for me and I'll take care of them! 0%

8. Queen Jadis: Women rule! Vote for me and Narnia could become like Charn forever! 0%

9. Queen Lucy: Wait...there are elections in Narnia? I'm just here for a book tour. My new book 'Through the Wardrobe and What Lucy Found There' is already a Narnia Times best seller. It is available at in both hard/softcover and on Kindle. 0%

10. King Miraz: I'm not running for king, just lord protector. Vote not for me and I'll send you on adventures you've never dreamed of! 0%

11. King Rillian: Hoping for the Bism vote. I know what its like to be in bondage! 0%

12. Queen Swanwhite: I'm counting on my face to get me elected. 0%

13. None of them: Are you kidding? Aragorn would be so much better! 0%

14. Undecided: Who are these people? 0%


End file.
